DID U DO IT.....?

Nosey Parker was snooping around as usual with his beak buried deep in the garbage when to his utter exhilaration he heard the cries in the sky, “Did ye du et — Did ye du et did did?” Nosey Parker looked up to shoot; I mean record in his camera, the exclusive bytes.

The Jungle Babbler, known for his intrusive, naughty and yarn-spinning habits, tweeted at the journo, winked at him and beckoned as if to give the official version. Taken aback, as if someone else had also picked up his exclusive scoop, the journo questioned the impish bird if he also heard the shrieks of, “Did you do it!”

The Babbler knew the anxiety of Nosey Parker and in furtherance of his innate endeavour to tease him he whispered something in the ears of the stringer. “Can you arrange an interview with her? Oh please don’t say no!” “Well, it happens almost daily. It’s not something unusual with her. It’s not at all which makes news, I mean the man-biting-the-dog sort of?” the Babbler tried to rubbish the reporting idea.

Nosey Parker insisted, “No dear, what after all was there in Gudiya, Farzana and Anara episodes? Still we had to drag these poor things out of their homes and present the “real picture” before the people in larger public interest, particularly when every journalist, howsoever incredible, had been doing it”.

“Oh yes, there you are. You followed the stories since everyone was (over) doing it. Well, there ees a point in that.” The Babbler muffled the “over” part and stressed the “is”. Again the tweet of “Did ye du et duet — did did” rented the open skies. Nosey Parker became restless when the Jungle Babbler grimaced turning his eyes away from the curious reporter.

The Babbler asked Nosey Parker to watch and record from a distance when he would be interviewing the victim of “Did you do it?” “Behenji, will you tell our audience how do you feel after going through the ordeal of ‘Did you do it’ since you have been tweeting for quite some time seeking to know the culprit?” The victim squeaked at him scornfully, “D,did ye du et?” “No, no behenji, I am a journalist. I don’t do myself. I simply fling the others’ doing in public-ehm-ehm, bird interest only!” The Babbler again sneered with his tongue firmly in his beak.

Having interviewed the “victim”, Nosey Parker rushed and pridefully presented the story to the Editor. Lo and behold, everything got washed out — video, audio and everything. The disgusted Editor gave good amount of birdshit to Nosey Parker who rushed back to look up the Jungle Babbler.

He overheard the naughty Babbler talking to the forgetful Lap Wing: “I knew that you as habit would forget the place of your laying eggs and then scream around as if someone had stolen them squeaking ‘Did you do it’, but this Nosey Parker fellow thought he had picked up the best of scoops.”

Having known this now, Nosey Parker asked them as if cheated, “But what happened to my recording?” Replied the Jungle Babbler, “Don’t you know we have beepers and jammers planted under our wings to ward off the recording done by the likes of you in larger bird interests.” They laughed to their guts content while Nosey Parker again buried his beak in the garbage.

This article was published in The Tribune on Oct 21, 2005.